I liked to think I could hold my own- that I wasn’t completely at the mercy of other people’s moods.
But guess what?  I’m not.

There are days when I wake up in a great mood, feeling upbeat and ready for the day. Then I cross paths with someone who’s clearly in a bad mood-grumpy, rude, short-and next thing I know, I’ve taken a nose dive. Now I’m grumpy too.

What about you?
Does that ever happen to you?

The truth is, this happens to all of us.
We’re all sensitive to the emotional energy around us- whether it’s positive or negative.

So what actually happens when we’re around someone who’s in a negative mood?

Imagine walking into a grocery store.
The cashier is clearly in a foul mood. They’re rude. Snapping. Sharp with their words.
Just pause and imagine that for a moment.

Now notice how you’re responding inside.
What are you feeling?

For me, I feel irritated. Annoyed. Mistreated. Resentful.
But when I really slow down and pay attention, I notice something underneath all of that.

Their rudeness, their energy-it makes me feel unsafe.
My chest tightens. My stomach tenses.
I feel stressed. On edge.
It was a bit of a shock to realize that in those are the moments when I feel unsafe, I’m afraid. 

But instead of recognizing that fear directly, I react with everything else - annoyance, defensiveness, frustration. That’s how I’ve learned to react to feeling afraid. 

And here’s the kicker: when I respond from that place of negativity, guess what happens?
I end up triggering even more negativity in them.

Because under their snapping and rudeness is fear too.
My reaction makes them feel even more unsafe, more overwhelmed.
So they get even more reactive.

And on it goes.

It’s like an emotional spiral.
Each of us pulling the other down.
Each of us reacting from fear.
Each of us unintentionally feeding the fear in the other.

So what can we do about it?

One simple, powerful thing is to pause and remind yourself:
Oh, right. I’m feeling this way because I’m afraid. And they’re acting this way because they’re afraid too.

That small moment of awareness can shift everything.

You’re not a bad person.
They’re not a bad person.

You’re both just afraid. That’s all.

And when you can see the fear under the emotion, something softens.
It doesn’t make the situation perfect.
But it gives you a little space to breathe.
And maybe even respond differently.

Try it.
See what shifts for you.